Until Our Prodigals Come Home

 

            Twenty-seven years ago, our sixteen-year-old daughter left home. It’s a day I’ll never forget. I can’t. It’s seared into the very depths of me. I will never understand why she did this, and she may never understand why this hurts so much. For her, she finally “got her way”—something she’d wanted all along.

            We always thought one day she’d come home. No, not just walk-in-the-door come home. Change-of-heart come home. There’s a huge difference. How do we know? Because a couple years after she left, she “dropped in” for a visit, was gone again, proverbially came back again (now as a married woman with a child, then another, then another), then cut all ties.

            It’s too long and complicated a story to write here. I wouldn’t want to anyway. Suffice to say, our prodigal never REALLY came home—not in her heart. So, to this day, we have this great divorce—one we didn’t ask for. One we didn’t want. One we hate. But “it is what it is.” (I despise that expression at times.)

            For years I thought the hurt would never go away, but we’ve learned it doesn’t. Sometimes it changes, and then in an instant something will spark a reminder; and it grows again. Even in the past month or so I’ve cried. How is it possible tears never run out? But they don’t.

            There’s some comfort in knowing we’re not alone. Many parents have had prodigal children. Some comfort. Only some. Yes, others we can relate to, talk to, listen to, exchange hugs with. But, in the end, “it is what it is.” If you’re parent of a prodigal, I may understand how you feel, but I can’t promise the pain will ever end. Only hope it does.

            Yes, we can pray. And must. God’s desire is for our children to come home. We know that by His Word. God loves family and wants strong ones. He instructs parents to love their children and children to honor their parents. So, know the prayer for your prodigal aligns with God’s Heart and Mind.

            Herein lies the problem. Not all prodigals come home. As sad as that thought may be, “it is what it is.” Why? Because they’ve not had a heart-change. So, even if a son or daughter returns, if there’s been no real change within, has the prodigal REALLY come home?

            For many YEARS we prayed our prodigal would return. I no longer ask that of God. What I do ask is this: That our daughter returns to God. That’s all. Why? Because, if or when she does, THEN she’ll genuinely “come home,” be it physically or a long-distance reconciliation.

            So, parents of prodigals, don’t give up. I’ve wanted to often. I have numerous times. But God doesn’t give up on those who’ve turned from Him. He still desires a relationship—reconciliation—with them. Being He’s our perfect example, how can I give up? (Remind me of this, though, next time I do. I’m flawed.)

            Your prodigals may come home, and we will rejoice with you exceedingly! But if they don’t, continue to pray for them—that God sends SOMEONE to deliver His and your message!

            One thing I learned from another family going through this is that God can use someone along their wandering way to straighten their sights toward the Savior. It need not be me, us, or anyone who knows our daughter.

            In the case of the family I’ve mentioned, God used a bus driver.

            “You need to go home,” that bus driver said. And that prodigal returned to God then her parents.

            Prodigal, are you the one reading this? Then know you’re always welcomed home. The Savior is waiting.

            So are we.

“There were ninety and nine that safely lay in the shelter of the fold,

But one was out on the hills away, far off from the gates of gold—

Away on the mountains wild and bare, away from the tender Shepherd’s care…

Lord, Thou hast here Thy ninety and nine; Are they not enough for Thee?

But the Shepherd made answer: ‘This of Mine has wandered away from Me;

And although the road be rough and steep, I go to the desert to find My sheep…

But none of the ransomed ever knew how deep were the waters crossed’

Nor how dark was the night the Lord passed thro’ ere He found His sheep that was lost.

Out in the desert He heard its cry—So sick and helpless and ready to die…

‘Lord, whence are those blood-drops all the way that mark out the mountain’s track?’

‘They were shed for one who had gone astray ere the Shepherd could bring him back.’

‘Lord, whence are Thy hands so rent and torn?’ ‘They are pierced tonight by many a thorn’…

And all through the mountains, thunder-riven, and up from the rock steep,

There arose a glad cry to the gate of heaven, ‘Rejoice! I have found my sheep!’

And the angels echoed around the throne, ‘Rejoice, for the Lord brings back His own!’…

 

(from the song “There Were Ninety and Nine”—lyrics by Elizabeth Cecilia Clephane, written in 1868)

#prodigal #runaways #home #brokenfamily #reconciliation #prayer

*Photo credit: Lori Lueders